From
http://www.zdnet.com.au/blogs/upwardlymobile/soa/CDMA-Enough-of-the-bad-language
/0,2000066194,339285311,00.htm

The day of reckoning finally arrived for CDMA -- and was then postponed,
leaving everyone with any strong feeling on the subject a nice window of
three months to once again enjoy the semantic back-and-forth the closure
provokes.

There's been lots of interesting language being bandied about in the last
couple of days over CDMA and its antecedent.

Take this for example, from Broadband Minister and Adrian Mole lookalike
Stephen Conroy: "I want to finish today by thanking Telstra on their
co-operation in this matter. Telstra should be congratulated for investing
extensively in its Next G network, which has received world recognition. I
appreciate the resources and commitment Telstra has brought to implementing
its new national network."

And from Telstra's head of public policy and Raymond Burr lookalike Phil
Burgess: "We welcome the government's decisive action on this important
transition in the nation's telecommunications future. We are also pleased
that the Minister has provided clear direction to Telstra and to consumers
about how to proceed to make sure this transition is completed:

Something in this sound odd to you? All the hearts and flowers,
sticky-mouthed kisses and clammy handholding from Telstra and the
government? It's all a bit Lady and the Tramp, the two parties at either end
of that strand of spaghetti.

This isn't the rough and tumble we're used to from Telstra when a decision
doesn't go its way. Could the grumpy telco be mellowing out? Unlikely, but
Conroy can dream.

The other titbit that produced much linguistic frothing at the mouth, not
least on ZDNet.com.au's talkback, was this Conroy classic:

"Telstra can only switch off the CDMA network when I consider that its
replacement provides equivalent coverage and equivalent retail services. I
have reached a decision that I am not in a position to declare equivalence
between the Next G network and the CDMA networks, and therefore the closure
of the CDMA network will be postponed."

Depending on what side of the fence you're on, that translates as "Next G
has the same or better coverage as CDMA, there's just a few retail issues to
be ironed out," or "The coverage may be the same, but there's enough else
wrong to warrant a delay to the CDMA closure".

I presume where you stand on that issue is a question of how you find your
Next G coverage and so I'll leave it to bush users to pick the winning
statement.

My favourite use of language so far on the CDMA debate was in a press
release from the telco itself, reminding its customers to double check
they're on Next G.

How exactly should they do that? We'll quote directly from Telstra on this
one:

When the phone is on, check the front screen and see if it says 'CDMA'. If
it does, then you are using the old CDMA network.

No laughing at the back.

It would be churlish of me to suggest this is stating the sodding obvious
(even though it is) but think about it for a second. There are, I'm
guessing, three main groups of CDMA users out there, each with distinctly
different reactions to the impending network closure.

   * The people who have heard Telstra's messages about the closure, know
that time is running out -- acts of Conroy excepted -- and have already made
the switch. Maybe they've grumbled a bit about having to shell out for a new
mobile but they're now confirmed Next G customers. These guys are probably
the type that find the 'does your phone say CDMA? Then you're using CDMA'
message risible.
   * Those who have heard Telstra's messages about the closure, know that
time is running out -- acts of Conroy excepted -- and have attempted to make
the switch but found without Next G coverage or with their equipment not
quite up to scratch. They'll be grumbling a lot. These guys are probably the
type that are slightly irate about the whole thing.
   * The people that haven't heard anything about the CDMA switchoff. They
live in a black hole, and not a coverage one either. They may well find the
'does your phone say CDMA?' message handy. Of course, they're so cut off,
they're never going to see it anyway.